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xsw
Eric Xue
Hi! I mainly just write my thoughts about a variety of things in my blog. I mostly try to keep it anonymous and minimal, so I don't feel bound by anything I say--I think it captures the freedom of journaling much more.
Latest Posts
I started this blog to document and reflect on random moments from my life. Eventually to find that it was a poor medium for doing so. Though anonymous (to a certain degree), my page is public facing. No matter how much I tell myself to...
I woke up yesterday sick as hell. I don't even know how it got so bad, since I was completely fine the day before. It wasn't until almost noon did I muster the strength to slog to campus for breakfast. It's only a five-minute walk, but...
Half motion-sick, I stumbled off the coach. To my left, a glittering flow of cars three lanes strong whooshes past. Looks like a lot of people still have somewhere to be tonight. Not me, though. Stepping back into my childhood home, it...
Late at night, I laid awake, fixated on the ceiling of my dorm. Before going to bed I'd just seen a post of my high school crush with a friend, roommate, or whatever, at a concert. Just the two of them. This wasn't her first post of its...
I remember a conversation I had with my parents on approximately my 15th birthday. They asked me if I wanted to live on my own yet, to which I responded with an emphatic "no". They cautioned me to not be so confident in this answer. On...
There's a popular idea that cats don't see humans as we see ourselves. Rather, they see us as some kind of big and strange cat. One of many cat-related things I've learned recently is that my cats actually believe I'm out hunting...
"What's your favorite color?" "None, I don't have one." I always get the impression that my father is a slightly odd person. So he doesn't have a favorite color. I asked him about that when I was very young and I thought his reply was...
My summers have been getting quieter. The camps from when I was a little kid, the family outings, the high school extracurriculars--they're all gone. It's just me and my home now. This is my summer after graduating high school. It'll be...
I wish I could have been born earlier, in time to experience what I've come to see as the golden days of computer science: When it was an uncool, mathy field of scientific study. Today, the deeper I go, the more disillusioned I become...
When I leave for university this fall, I'll have a chance to reinvent myself. I've always thought about the day when I actually do so. What kind of person do I want to become? Actually, the fact alone that I've thought of this question...
My father tells me that I'm still young, and that I haven't truly failed at anything yet. Though, I never told him about you. I'm sure of it: You are my first true failure. Since November of 2023, my life hasn't been the same. All...
8:03 AM. I’m in class right now. It’s my last day of high school. I have my earbuds in. Listening to music I used to listen to and such. It’s moving how each song brings back a memory for me. A vision of the past, a moment where I played...
I had my Chinese writing final today. The prompt made full sense to me. Elaborate responses formed in my head. But I knew it was hopeless. I couldn't transfer them to the paper. My thinking redirected towards circumvention. I needed to...